Darkside
by KrystylSky
Summary: Hawke has many secrets she is keeping the least of which is her sister being a mage. Hawke was gifted at a young age with Lycanthrope by a mage. Hawke is a werewolf. How can she keep her family safe and will she find someone to love her darkside. (F.Hawke/Fenris & Anders/Bethany) Very AU! Some chapters may be graphic.
1. Chapter 1 - Prologue

Hawke has many secrets she is keeping the least of which is her sister being a mage. Her name may be Hawke yet she is an altogether different kind of predator.

How can she keep her family safe and watch her as she finds new family.

Very AU! Will mostly follow the story. (Not killing Bethany)

Story may become graphic. Most Chapters will be T rating Will notify when ratings will change.

POV may change as well.

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From grace she fell beneath the ashes

That forced her to her knees  
Cut her open wide

To bleed her body dry of feeling  
The wounds will form no scars  
Only memories

Tearing at the scars, she's open wide  
Screaming 'til her lungs collapse  
Behind her cold and vacant eyes,  
The innocence that dies inside.

The tears that line her face.  
The anguish  
The taste that haunts her lips  
Closing loveless eyes

To bleed her body dry the feeling  
Of breath escaping lips  
Closing lifeless eyes.

Tearing at the scars, and now she's open wide  
A broken bitter heart that's stained in black  
Behind her cold and vacant eyes.  
The innocence that dies inside.

Prey: The Agony Scene

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Journal:

That's it one year after arriving to Kirkwall. It's been over a year since I have been able to write. My old journals are now in ashes in Lothering. I used a small amount of money to buy a new journal.

Life will become interesting. We have just stopped running from the Blight and finished working off our contract for Athenril. We lost Carver to the blight. Mother blames me. She thinks because of the gift that I am responsible. I admit I feel guilt as well for my failure to get us all safely free from Lothering. We made a new friend her name is Aveline. I worked out a deal with Athenril that I would work off the debt for Aveline. She is not cut out for smuggling life. Aveline when we got to Kirkwall joined the city guard. I wish her the best.

Aveline has turned out to be a great friend. She is in the guard and she has trusted people watching Bethany and I to keep us safe and I know some of her reports have misdirected information. She has also helped Bethany hide from Templars. For that alone, I will consider any debt between us paid in full. She is a great older sister.

So two days ago Bethany and I tried to join an expedition for entering the deep roads. We were turned down. Bartrand wanted to have nothing to do with us. However, we met a dwarf named Varric. He wanted us to come up with 50 sovereigns in order to help fund the expedition in order to get some of the profit. We will see.

I will have to make sure Varric does not find out about me. He already knows about Bethany. We were able to keep my secret away from Athenril and her crew. Aveline knows. She found out in our escape to Gwaren but she said she would keep all of our secrets. My instincts tell me to trust her and Varric.

Varric is a funny story telling dwarf with a crossbow named Bianca. He cares for her like I care for Fang and Talon. He seems to have many contacts in many places and has a thumb on the pulse of this city; both the legitimate ones and the not so legit ones. I sense a story behind the name of Bianca and maybe in time I will hear the story. Varric is calling Bethany Sunshine and somehow everyone here is calling me Hawke. I think Varric is protective of Bethany. She is so sweet natured who could blame him.

Tonight we met a Grey Warden mage named Anders. He has talent for healing. We did a job for him and he will give us maps to the Deep Roads. He makes me nervous. I will watch him closely. Bethany is star struck by him. If he hurts her I will end him and the fade spirit in him. Templars will be the least of his worries.

Tomorrow is a busy day we will be going out to Sunder Mount for Flemeth and we will be helping a woman named Captain Isabella, and we will be doing a job for a dwarf named Anso. No rest for the weary.

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Please review - I would like to know if there is real interest in this story. I am still new to writing fiction so please bear with me.


	2. Chapter 2 - Flashback

Flashback

The first thing Marian thought of when she woke up in the morning was that the forest is too quiet. She tries to reach for her blades under her bedroll. She is alert and nervous. Her father takes her on these trips because she is the oldest (by only 2 years at age 16) and knows how to use two swords and a bow.

Marian is not a vain girl she knows she is average looking she has short black hair and her father's striking blue eyes. She is of average height but this is to her advantage when trying to sneak and working on her rouge skills. She is much better suited to sneaking than Carver. Carver is all rush in and bash let everyone know he is coming. Marian is better at hiding in the shadows and tries to only kills when needed.

Sensing the out of place quiet she quickly packs up their stuff and nudges her father awake. Handing him some dry rations as they proceed to get and pack up. She moves to put her cloak on. Chilled even though she has on her long sleeved armor, winter is starting to end and the air often still has a bite to it.

"Papa, when will we see the Dalish?" Marian Hawke asks as she lifts up her father's pack to hand to him and their tent. "Their camp is roughly 2 more days from here." Malcolm Hawke grunts after shouldering his pack. Malcolm often trades with the Dalish for magical items as he provides them with healing training as he is a spirit healer.

_Are you there? Can you hear me? _A voice whispers softly into her mind.

"Papa!" Marian Whispers loudly and grabs both of her swords and moves into a battle ready stance. Seeing her actions her father quietly pulls out his staff. "What do you sense?" he inquires.

"I hear a voice in my mind." She worries her bottom lip, tilts her head and focuses intently in the distance. "_Hello?" "What is going on?" _Marian thinks back to the entity.

The forest around her goes completely pitch black. She can see or hear nothing. She cannot even see the hand in front of her face. Suddenly in front of her appears a beautiful woman. The woman is silhouetted by light. However, the look on her face, made Marian want to run into the nearest Chantry and confess everything in her life at top speed.

She is unable to move any part of her body except her head. Frustratingly enough she realizes she is standing in the middle of a glyph. Puzzled she thinks back to her sister's lessons with her father and tries to remember what the glyph is.

"Hello child." The woman initiated conversation by lightly touching her arm.

As Marian looks down she realized she was not wearing her armor but an outfit made of fur and lined with fur. The fur is the softest she has ever felt. It is an indescribable white color. It is so white it is almost silver. Her top was sleeveless and only covered the top of her chest. Her midriff and her whole back are bare. The bottom was a skirt and started at her pelvic bone and only had ties at the sides it came to a point like two triangles tied together. Her feet have been clad in boots made of fur tied together around the sides and she has matching bracers.

Her swords have also been changed. She now holds two daggers made of star metal with handles shaped like wolves guarded by a Hawk. The tip of the blade appears as a wolf head. The sides of the dagger handle are a hawk with its wings spread out. On one side of the handle facing the blade has a claw extended from the wolf. The other side of the handle facing the blade is talons extended from the hawk. The eyes of the wolf are two small emeralds. The eyes of the Hawk are two bright small sapphires. The gems sparkle and swirl with magic. The daggers also appear to have four rune slots.

The blade itself it etched with symbols many she does not know but two symbols she does and those two symbols are the symbols for the Templar and the Seeker. She can tell the blades will make her attacks faster, longer and attack harder as well as doing nature damage. There is a slight sheen on the daggers, when looking one way they look blue, when looking at them in a different direction they glow green.

Without understanding how, she knows the daggers have names. The dagger glowing mostly blue is named Fang, the dagger glowing green is Talon.

She knows it is star metal because a man blacksmith called Dryden came to lathering one summer and showed her the metal and how he worked it into a two handed blade. The blade was commissioned for a Duke of Orlais, Bryce Cousland had ordered it.

Marian looks up sharply at the woman and in trepidation.

"You have been chosen. You have the blood of Amell. That is an ancient magical line and we have been looking for you for a long time. You will be blessed or cursed depending on how you view it. Your line is chosen for a gift. A gift you will need in the future," as she continues touching Marian.

Where she touches tingles as she looks down her arms are covered in a tattoo there are symbols and beautiful images of wolves intertwined with vines and a paw that looks like a wolf paw intertwines with a talon she assumes is a Hawk talon. The woman moves to her back and traces her back with both hands. As she is touched the tingling turns into a stinging sensation and a tightening like her muscles are working out hard with a lot of training after a day of hard work with Carver. But the pain is manageable and is a good kind of pain. She can feel more images appear on her back and at the base of her spine. The woman taps her fingers over her legs the front and back. On her shins symbols of the moon are intertwined.

The woman covers her hand over her lower stomach and heat sears though her and her thighs start to get wet from arousal. Her mind is screaming at her. Marian mentally wants to flee and worries for her Father. But her body screams for release. Burned into her abdomen is a Dalish symbol. She has seen this in her father's books. It is the Dalish symbol for fertility!

"You will carry her vessel, she will return, with the strength given to you and your protectors you will bring her into the world and she will free us all!" the woman then reaches down and touches her intimately.

Confused Marian had only ever touched herself and only a handful of times. Her body explodes. As the light explodes behind her eyes and she finds release her body is released from movement and starts to change. Her muscles all tighten down and other muscles release. When the light dims she realizes the woman is towering over her. She looks down and sees paws. She is lying down. She turns her head looking down and back at herself. She is a wolf! A sparkling white wolf! It looks like the same fur color as the armor. She looks at the woman and whines in confusion.

"_You can think to who you want to communicate with them; in this form. You will also understand all speech but can only think in languages you know." _The woman looks at her with pride andwhat appears to be hope.

"_Who are you? Who is coming back? Why me? Why am I in this form? Am I a mage? Who are my protectors? What does this have anything to do with Templar and Seeker symbols? Will I be human again? How do I change forms? " _Marian thinks in a fast string of questions if talking she would be out of breath.

"_Peace! I am your Guardian, you can call me Ealisay. I will be here when you need me. You can change forms at will but at night in a forest will be easiest, you will also be at your strongest right at the moon rise and fall. To change forms you will simply will it. Eventually you may with practice be able to partially change forms. And you will always be able to communicate with other wolves. We are out of time child you will need to leave here. Your other questions will be answered in time. Now let's practice. Think human." _The woman tilts her head to the side and pulls out a vial of lyrium and drinks it while watching with excitement and anticipation.

Standing up on all fours Marian closes her eyes and thinks about herself being human, thinking about looking at herself in a mirror. She changes form in a significantly smaller light show than before and raises her hands in front of her and rotates them. Her fur armor and daggers are still with her.

"Your path will be difficult and many would try to harm you and your but do not lose hope and stay strong you will overcome and you will be much loved. For now get stronger and try to find your protectors. They will need you as much as you will need them. Now awake." Ealisay bows her head and says a small chant then Marian drops down unconscious.

Marian opens her eyes and looks over to her father and their gear is there. "What a bizarre dream!" She moves to wake her father up in the forest and stops as she stares down in awe and horror. On her pack next to their campfire is a folded set of fur armor with boots, bracers and two daggers.


	3. Chapter 3 - Notifying Father

Flashback Notifying the family - Father

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Marian opens her eyes and looks over to her father and their gear is there. "What a bizarre dream!" She moves to wake her father up in the forest and stops as she stares down in awe and horror. On her pack next to their campfire is a folded set of fur armor with boots, bracers and two daggers.

"Father!" She grasps her father's arm in panic and shakes him awake while starting to strip off her shirt.

"Marian, What? Where is the danger?" Malcolm sits up quickly looking at his daughter who is frantically stripping her clothes off. His eyes widen in awe and panic when he sees her markings. "What Happened?" He looks at her arms and grabs his staff to look for mages. He can feel the magic surrounding them and looks on in horror at the ground at the glyphs that are under and warding their campsite.

"A woman claiming to be my guardian said I was to carry a vessel. Who would 'save us all'? And I'm to find my protectors." What does that mean? Am I going to be an abomination or give birth to one? She said her name was Ealisay. And I can turn into a wolf now! Papa! Why me? Who is coming back? Who is she? Why do I have symbols from the Templar and Seeker factions on me? Are you and Bethany going to be safe? Can they track me? Papa I'm scared." Marian rambles out. Malcolm just looks at her and the wards in an inquisitive fashion.

In a panic, while remembering the 'dream;' Marian starts to think about her 'wolf' form. As she starts to think about this form in the distance she can hear the sounds of the forest. Her father starts to talk to her but she can only focus on the forest.

She can hear the padding of feet of other wolves, the sounds of birds calling out to each other in the forest. She can feel the thrumming in her head and her heart beats faster. There is the sound of deer in the forest and the smells of smaller creatures such as rabbits and squirrels. As she begins to open her senses more she can feel her muscles change and she shifts into her wolf form. After her change she excitedly sets of a string of sounds trying to talk and it come across a mix of yips, barks, and growls.

"Marian!" she looks over her father is sitting on her bedroll completely flabbergasted and unable to even defend himself. "Marian? Can you hear me child?" a tentative question is asked with his hand held out in a placating way as one would a wild animal. She walks over and licks his hand and puts her head in his lap.

_"Can you hear me? I can understand you." _ She stares into his eyes seeking and finding recognition.

"Can you change back? What did the woman look like? Was she a demon?" He raises an eyebrow in inquiry.

She unfurled and transformed back into her human form.

"Tell me exactly what she looked like." He commanded in an anxious tone.

Her eyes glaze over and she steps into a memory. He stares intently waiting for her description.

"She called herself Ealisay. She claimed to be my guardian." She had pure white robes and silver patterns and thread; that looked like the Revered Mother in the Chantry at Denerim. She had a golden tan like she lived by the ocean, but her skin glowed. She felt holy. My first thought was to go to the Chantry and start a confession. Her hair was pulled back into two braids on the back of her head. Her hair was a deep red color. She felt holy to me. When she touched me my skin tingled. I felt lighter, free, and happy. I do not believe she was a demon but she felt like magic like you and Bethany. Where she touched she left all of these markings from all different people." She recounted with awe still in her voice.

"She said she was my guardian. What does that mean? She said she was giving me a gift that could be a curse. I am to be a vessel for some lady. Am I going to be an abomination? I was given the form of the wolf for protection I think. When in my wolf form I can speak to people with my thoughts but only in the languages I know. But, I would understand what everyone is saying even not in languages I know." She looks at her father in question and a small amount of fear. "What does this all mean? Papa, I'm scared."

"Oh child, your mother is going to kill me. Well let's try and figure this out. It certainly looks like we will be asking the Dalish Keeper more questions." He reaches out to examine me with his magic with anxiety, love, fear, and hope all rolling and swirling in his eyes.

They spent the rest of the day experimenting in camp.


	4. Chapter 4 - Rituals and Magic

Rituals and Magic

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Apprehensive Marian walks next to her father a few hours away from Lothering. Walking along the Kings highway carrying her backpack; with her new blades hidden in sheaths given to her by the Dalish; she ponders all that has happened in the last week.

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The Dalish Keeper Ilshae was intrigued with the markings and the shifting ability. The markings were Dalish and the one on her navel did indeed mark her for fertility. Ilshae notified her of a Dalish right embodying their code called Vir Adahlen "Way of the Forest -Together we are stronger than one." This rite will bind a lifemate and will bond any children to the parents. The upside to the rite is that it will guarantee a child to the couple. The downside to the rite is that when one lifemate dies the other will die with them. This rite is apparently rarely used because to lose a pair among the Dalish would be a tragedy with their dangerous lifestyle and low population already. However as the rite is already half completed information was given to both Malcolm and Marion on how to complete the binding rite. She didn't want to think about that right now.

The symbols on the daggers are a combination of Arcanum, ancient Elven, Dalish, and Dwarven. There are two faction symbols as well the Templar and Seeker Sigils. All the Mages looking at them could not find the connection. The only thing they could come up with is that the daggers together with the markings on her back created a prophecy. But they were not able to decipher what it was. Copies of all the symbols were made for further study.

While the three mages Malcolm, Ilshae and his second Solan were working on the deciphers, Marian went with the Dalish hunters into the forest to work more on her shifting and hunting skills. In wolf form she was accepted more so than in her human form, however her age and predicament as well as her personality allowed the hunters to warm up to her.

Out in the forest she was learning more and more skills. She found her senses were amazingly open. She could smell and see amazing things. Her speed and strength were increased. The hunters were also able to point out to her how to make tracks like other wolves so as not to stick out. She was able to help the hunters in return by sniffing out usable ironbark. Ultimately she agreed, she was given a gift. But how were others to react. She was in fear of how others would treat her if they knew. Understanding how mages were treated Marian knew if anyone found out then they would either think her a mage or worse and would seek to kill her.

After three days of practice in the forest Marian sought out other wolves. She could always sense where they were and they would verbally call out to her. The last night in the Brecilian forest, Marian decided to leave on her own. After dark she shifted and ran into the forest. It was lightly raining and few animals were out.

She started to run. If anyone were to look at her they would have seen a thing of primal beauty and would have thought a child of the old gods were at play. A streak of white light ran through the trees as she moved by weaving and twisting in what seemed like random patterns the trees appeared to become brighter and more healthy and full of life. Roughly one candle mark into the run, though it seemed only moments, three other wolves joined her on her run. Two females both grey and sleek in their beauty and one brown male wolf; all three of the wolves were juvenile as their youth were what allowed them to keep up with her. None were out hunting they were simply running with the joy of running in a pack. The more time spent with her chasing each other the more all four glowed with the shine of the moon. It was unearthly and would have been a sight to see. As time slowed and the moon started to fade Marian decided to return to camp. Howling a goodbye she was escorted back to camp in the dawn light.

Unbeknownst to Marian, during her change back to human a few of the hunters prayed to their creators as they were in awe of the sight. Marian glowed with the light of the dawn her fur turned from white to the colors of the sun coming across the horizon. It appeared to the elves that each hair of fur seemed to be an individual ray of moonlight that rotated to sunlight. As the white faded to yellows and oranges and reds, her body also changed shape. She stood upright and the fur armor she was given also reflected the changes in light. The colors settled into white at last and her form was back to her normal shape. The only difference was her blue eyes. Her normally blue eyes swirled with a forest green.

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"When we get home go gather Carver and Bethany and bring them into the house. I will caste a silence ward so no one will over hear us and we will tell your mother what has happened." Malcolm states while rubbing his hand over the back of his neck.

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Please read and Review and let me know what you think.


	5. Chapter 5 - Notifying the Family

Notifying the Family – Mother, Carver, and Bethany

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Lothering is a trading post for goods and supplies to places like Redcliff, Highever, and Orzamar. There are all types of races in Lothering an being close to the wilds there are even Chasind. The village itself is part of South Reach. It is right off the Imperial highway and is next to the river Dane and the River Drakon. It borders the Wilds and the Becillian forest. It has many farms in the outlying area. Our farm was a ways away from the main city. It was hard but honest work.

We had a small 3 bedroom cottage with a kitchen and a small connected bathhouse. We had a chicken coop and a small barn. In front of the barn was a small training ring for Melee and archery.

The only animals we had were chickens and a cow. We have a young Mabari named Biscuit. We named him that because the breeder who we got him from had a wife who was a baker and when we got him he was covered in flour eating a bowl full of biscuits.

"I'm going to get your mother. Find Carver and Bethany meet me in the house." Father said as he walked o towards the house. His steps rigid.

She sighed in anxiousness and looked around. No one was in the fields and there was barking coming from the barn. Walking towards the barn she looked at the training area set up thinking about how to train with the new daggers and with Carver.

"Biscuit! Stop hewing on the wheat!" "Bethany, get him out of here." Bickering can be heard from the barn.

"At least some things never change." Muttering to herself softly as she walks in. cautiously she opens the barn door so as not to be run over by excited Mabari. "Bethany. Carver. Family meeting."

"What is going on?" "Do we have to move again? Did We get caught?" Bethany and Carver simultaneously ask. Carver stands up from tying batches of wheat together. Bethany is sitting on some barrels with her legs swinging freely.

"Just follow me. It's complicated; Father wants to talk. Just… Just come. " She turns and walks out with Biscuit on her heels.

Ignoring her siblings behind her an lost in thought she automatically walks to the house worried about her family and their reactions to the news.

Walking into the house she sees her father setting up the wards and her mother looking worried sitting at the table silent. She moves to stand next to the fireplace. Still lost in thought, she stares intently at the fire as if the fire will solve her problems.

"Marian?" A hand touches her shoulder. She looks up her father is staring at her in question. Finally paying attention, Carver is standing by the door with his arms crossed over his chest and a sword on his back. Bethany is sitting at the table next to mother hugging her from the side. Biscuit is sitting by the other side of the fireplace. Marian nods at him letting him know she is ready. It is time to notify the family.

"Marian has had an incident the how and why I am still trying to figure out. However, what we do know is this. She is now able to shift forms into a wolf." Malcolm intently looks at the family gauging their reactions.

"What!" exclaims Carver in horror.

"How? Is she a mage?" Bethany inquires.

"Maker. Oh my poor child." Mother breathes in a resigned tone.

"Show them." Malcolm nods to her his gaze full of love and support.

She moves and thinks about her wolf form. The transition is much faster with practice now. In the space of a few heartbeats her form is changed into a wolf.

Biscuit jumps and starts to yip playfully at her. Mother and Bethany are completely silent and stunned. Mother has her hand over her mouth and a hand over her heart eyes wide. Bethany just drops her jaw.

Carver looks nervous his hands drop from his chest to reach for his sword.

_Carver its ok it's still me. _His eyes bulge and his hands shake as he puts them back across his chest.

_Mother, Carver, Bethany, I and talk to you and understand if you talk to me. _She thinks at them while sitting in a non-threatening pose. Snorting comes out when she tries to sigh. Biscuit realizing that she is not going to play right now, sits back down beside her sniffing at her fur.

"I know you have questions we will answer what we can." Malcolm pulls out a chair to sit next to Leandra and taker her hand and kisses the back of it. Her eyes soften and she demands, "Tell us what you do know."

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Please let me know what you think of how this is going. Thank you for those who are reading and following. I will respond to reviews if I can.

Next chapter will be back in Kirkwall.


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